GTG: Honorary member, the honor of belonging

Jaime Fox on Robert Downey, Jr.,  "you are an honorary black man, because you have been in jail twice".  Statement by a black man to a white man, without offending any sensibilites, becaase it was said a black man on a black subject.

The same thing was mentioned at a dinner party I attended some weeks back, there was a Chinese guy, who has a PhD in Chemistry, not that it mattered, but he will say something negative about the Chinese culture, followed by a clarificatory remark that he is Chinese, therefore he can say it.

It was a lovely dinner that one, hosted by a friend, it was the first time that I went, she has been inviting me ever since I met her, it was always in conflict with another event or there is no means to get there. This time another friend is going so that was kewl.

It was an interesting mix and so conversation flowed from smoking pot, sex and the stand of the pope on condoms. tesla cars, trips, etc. because of the different background opinions also differs. Some of the remarks:

I was not Catholic but I studied in Catholic schools, so I guess it was okay, by my parents too, to convert me, although they weren't successful. I lived in Italy, even the Italians don't take it that seriously.

Can't stay in Turkey for more than a week, if you like pork, you will start to miss it.

Everything that we say or do is a sin and we are going to go to hell.

There were at least 2 people from different cultures and who have not smoked pot their whole lives. They don't find a reason to.

The sad thing about the media is when they highlight certain issues, for example the comment of the Pope about the use of condoms. They stopped listening after that, they didn't hear the qualifying statement that a prostitute who uses condoms so as not to spread disease is showing remorse and cautions for the exercise of profession and is therefore exercising a Christian conscience. But still the use of condom by a husband and wife as not being accepted in church still holds.

It seems that smoking pot is not gauged by a person's intelligence but rather how content he is with his life, Lordy has to factor in on this right? For where do you gain your contentment and the natural joys of life but from him.

I find that people have their own convictions, whether it is just based on hearsay, well thought of, or plain belief in the truth, and to dissuade them will be a lost cause. Rather to plant the seed of new ideas or to show the benefits and joys reaped from my belief is something worthwhile to do. Respect for others is a virtue stemming from God's desire for us to show compassion and love for one other no matter what circumstance they may have.

Have you hear of the new Tesla cars, these are the new electric cars, manufactured in the Palo Alto and will now be manufactured in the old Nummi plant, efficient production, marketed and sold inhouse. There will be not dealership. A different model altogether but looks promising, they have a waiting list for their 100K priced cars and later they will start to manufacture and sell affordable sedans.

Have not seen these but I heard there were 3 cars, Saturn included, different manufacturers, same size, shape just different logo, now that's making fun of the consumers.

Thanks Mari for such a wonderful dinner, and if you like it, feel free to share your recipe for pinacolada and the other wonderful food that you served.

Note: GTG is get together not got to go, a misnomer wouldn't you say so?

There is danger:

When I hate, for they might hate us back.

When you dislike my color, for having only one solid color can be boring and blinding.

When I reject, for I myself might be ejected.

When I complain, for God might take it all back thinking that I never liked what He gave me.

When I allow you to affect my psyche, go into my head, for I might turn into you.

When I don't accept, for I may not be accepted elsewhere too.

When you reject without trying, for you will miss out on new discoveries.

When you lose sight of what is important, for you will grow weary and disatisfied insisting on your own way as the right way.

When you don't smile, for you will get more wrinkles than Clinique's Turnaround Cream can fix.

Signs and Symptoms of Inner Peace

The Pastor at the Cathedral shared this article-an original thought i think  in the Sunday Bulletin, which I didn't pay too much attention to until a friend pointed it to me. I am sharing it here for everybody to enjoy.

Be on the alert for symptoms of inner peace. The hearts of a great many have already been exposed to inner peace and it is possible that people everywhere could come down with it in epidemic proportions. This could pose a serious thread to what has, up to now, been a fairly stable condition of conflict in the world.

 Some signs and symptoms of inner peace:

• A tendency to think and act spontaneously rather than on fears based on great experiences.


• An unmistakable ability to enjoy each moment.


• A loss of interest in judging other people.


• A loss of interest in interpreting the actions of others.


• A loss of interest in conflict.


• A loss of the ability to worry. (This is a very serious symptom.)


• Frequent overwhelming episodes of appreciation.


• Contented feelings of connectedness with others and nature.


• Frequent attacks of smiling.


• An increasing tendency to let things happen rather than make them happen.


• An increased susceptibility to the love extended by others as well as the uncontrollable urge to extend it.

You love her, she loves you; What's the problem?

Don't really care about the place, my first outing was a disappointment.  The beef stew was not as flavorful as I wanted, there is nothing redeeming about the place and it was expensive too.  A friend wanted to go there to check it out, the girlfriend is into these kind of places.  Though, I must tell you that the neighborhood is in serious want for white linen tables, such that anything new is wowed and salivated on.  So when the text came, "anyone for lunch?" I said yes, imagining Pho.  Ditched a Pinoy lunch, was ditched for Japanese noodles, so I said okay. 

The service was slow, between lectures on friendships, I am not judging but, and I didn't call because..  I managed to ask the wait staff, "What makes the sandwich Cuban?". The response I got was, "It is a traditional food that their family have everytime the chef's family have a get together in Cuba." Okay, that didn't answer my question, I rephrased the question and got an answer about maybe it was the roasting of the pork. Raised eyebrows about my impatience, I decided to enjoy my lunch and listen and react.

The sandwich was alright, a little pricey for a Friday lunch.  Cuban sandwich, it turned out was a grilled ham and cheese sandwich with pickles and roast pork in between. The bottom line of the afternoon, however was that friendship is not just going out to lunch, attending get togethers, we have to look also when we are enabling or when do we get off and remind them that there is always the alternative. I was reminded of the gospel last week, about calling the attention of a brother who has erred. But how do we know when we are reminding and not interloping. When are we not judging, if someone's behavior runs counter with the norm, knowing full well that the norn is not necessarily the right one. Ahhh, that is why we have to be in constant prayer, for guidance, for peace, for light, for trespasses, for compassion.. 

The lunch hour proved to be an hour well spent.  Back to work, where I took the rest of the afternoon off, I need to run errands and do the housework that needs my attention.  Well.. if only I didn't go to Antioch the day before for a "tulingan" lunch, the Tagalogs will understand such a call.. ha ha..

Franklin Square
2212 Broadway
(between Franklin St & Grand Ave)
Oakland, CA 94612
(510) 251-0100
www.fswinebar.com

The days that I was silent..

The days were stumbling against each other, each determined to be the one that is remembered, recalled, reminisced, and talked about. The flowers are wilted, the vase water is murky, stems rotting from soaking in the water, accepting defeat, having seen glory days, it's time to retire.  Those were the Passover flowers from T's mom, she brought them on Maundy Thursday, that was a long time ago.  A lot has transpired since then, but that day will always be remembered.

I have been browsing food blogs by Pinoys and was totally enjoying them, having my daily fill of Market Man, the scent of green bananas, desert comes first, and lasang pinoy. In between that Mark was at a standstill, he waiting if his love will say yes. 

That got me distracted from the general factotom, the humdrum of life.   I was beset with these quiet anxieties coloring my days. No, nothing grave, I guess it goes back to the responsibilities of my existence.

Anyhow, there really is no point in going back and overanalyzing things.  I chose not to, I remember as a kid (prekindergarte) I used to agonize if I am going to make the right choice of finding my mom in sea of people looking like her. I was imagining that my love for her will guide me in finding her amidst the seeming clones (cloning was probably just an idea at that time).  I probably was an unloved kid to have that much drama. 

I would have talked about a friend of mine who is undergoing such trial, but I didn't want to diminish his existence into a mere read.  That's why you don't get details here, I want you just get a whiff of it, maintaining what's private and kept in it's place.

I am undergoing PT good thing the person taking care of me is nice and gentle, I wouldn't want to risk broken bones with these swollen and aching muscles. I tell you, it is a challenge to age gracefully. There is something that I noticed about life, we like to label things, people, creating a picture using our own lenses, then we are disappointed if they don't appear the way we want them to.

Post Lent, Easter meanderings..

During the Holy Week, I was in a bit of a funk. My arm is bothering me and the cortizone shot didn't fix it.  Being in physical pain, of course didn't help my disposition. I was overly sensitive, morose at most.  So when a friend asked if I disclosed something that she told me, I was taken aback. What that translates to, for me, is she doesn't trust me, that I am such a blabbermouth. Of course, I didn't, now if it were good news or something else I will be the first one to announce to the world, even blog about it, ha ha.

So I carried that pinch in my heart for a long time (and you think I don't have drama) with the pain in my arm, until I felt Lordy hitting me in the head. I almost heard Him say to me, How dare you, expect trust from another human being, when sometimes your trust in me wavers.

Okaaay, that was an instant attitude correction. I needed that when I feel I am strong and confident about what I can, I forget, that it is nothing be Lordy's, not mine, there I am good, hoping to be better.

On another note, I had my first experience of a Passover meal, a "Noble" tradition, that I am so honored to share. Truly amazing, to break bread with them in a holy way. Wowww..

Then during the Easter Vigil, we ushered the new members of the church through Baptism. I am a sponsor to Pam, we journeyed through 6 months of RCIA and there they were drenched in oil, a very moving experience.  Friend T was also confirmed.  During the ceremony, our Pastor,   in his homily said that it is time to forget about arrogance, our self absorptions and be peaceful and love one another, or something of that effect, I was hit again in the jugular.  It was indeed a momentous event, the Holy Spirit was upon us.  To top it all, I renewed my own baptism with people who are dear to me, who has been with me in my renewal of faith. When I rediscovered Lordy.

Ahhhh such a great feeling.

What you eat..

I had lunch with the boys at work in the Oakland Seafood Market, it was somebody's birthday, we had to have noodles.  Although, they don't have that belief in their culture, we figured he might as well.  Noodles for long life eh!

So, I was reading the menu, frogs, snails, intestines, etc. one mentioned that he used to like it when he was younger, but he is starting to think about what he eats. I joked that he is getting to be too westernized, what's wrong with those. He said, yeah there can't be anything wrong with that God made and gave us those to enjoy.

Speaking of food, while waiting for at the doctor's office, I was reading my prayer book, there is a section on How to be a better Catholic, and it is talking about fasting at least once a week, and something about abstaining from certain foods.  I remember when I was younger, I kept saying it is not really the food that the abstinence from mean refers to but the call of the flesh.  My argument didn't go very far.

This is not an attempt to diminish the practice, I recognize the need for self denial to establish a deeper appreciation of our faith, a full stomach,  a threat to our carotid glands will certainly distract us from our efforts to be closer to God.

 At dinner last night, I agreed that sometimes we tend to over think our faith. It shouldn't be, feel it, practice it, and enjoy.

Oh, well..

My theory on faith...

Tiring weekends, leftovers, and spicy Indian food..

Yes, most of my weekend was spent cleaning and doing laundry. Adult tasks that I don't really care for. I almost wish for a previous life where I can use my weekends more productively.  Today, I woke up late, missed BYOW, good thing I went to mass yesterday, there was laundry, clearing of leftovers, and cleaning. Now my place is clean almost spotless, laundry is not yet finished, but that can wait.

Anyway, I promised myself that I will be better organized.

I said this 2 weekends ago, it is just too much, taking time out of play time and the numerous projects that I have set.

So why am I blabbering, uhmm nothing, just being nonsensical, sort of  justifying my long absence, I know, I know, you are waiting with bated breath ha ha.. such confidence.

Discovered an Indian restaurant that delivers, woohoo, that is a change but their food is spicier than most, that means I will have to chase a intake with water, not healthy at all.

On top of all the housework that I needed to do, I discovered space that I can use above the cupboard, covered by a singly plywood for aesthetic reasons. So 1 morning I decided to remove the covering and found a place for seldom used pots and pans. Double bonus, I discovered that little space between the refrigerator and the cupboard can hold the baking pans.  I can now officially declare that I am efficient packrat..

Hah!

Thanksgiving..

Thanksgiving had Tea cooking, slaving in the kitchen over pies, dressing (stuffing), and mashed potatoes. The milk on her pie is soy (tofu) milk. That gurl has energy, energy to stand by what she believes in, from sugar, to margarine, everything has to be produced ethically right. I am not oriented in any other way, just because I had occassion to see some of the primitive processes, and I can easily say that no cruelty is done, but then again I probably had more tolerance than others.  Tolerance not indifference mind you.  Anyway, it was a very pleasant dinner, a mixed group, indeed.

Conversation went from childhood to religion.  How it is difficult for some who were educated in the pre-Vatican II were made to memorize the Baltimore Cathechism. The teachings which had a clear definition of things, how an infraction can send someone careening to hell and with the new teachings those who were caught in between had nowhere to go. 

He was being funny, he said it is difficult to believe, but his kids are studying in a Catholic School, it is kinda like the idea that being a Catholic is like ball in chain, yet he still believes.

Some of us played scrabble, Tea's friend, jokingly said, for a Catholic you cleaned out pretty good.  To that we had a good laugh, true we can be labeled as such, we like being so..

Hey I was able to nudge a friend that her ploy of disappearing so that we will miss her, actually worked.

But I am digressing, I would like to share the things that I am thankful about:

• family (given)


• friends-great ones, am discovering and seeing a different side every time...


• dysfunction, then I am able to see what is and what isn't


• relationships, good, failed, and the wishful


• recognition that there is a God, and the sensitivity to recognize


• to black Fridays and grey Thursdays (althought we didn't really participate) I got a cheap slow cooker


• the growing consciousness of the need to care for the environment (I actually pledged not to buy bottled water)


• compassion not pity or worst patronizing


• the thinking people around me, they make my world colorful


• the ability to be still and savor the joys of life


• happiness

Thanks everyone for making this happen..

Do you still have your "ness"?

The final post for the day, lest I forget about this thought. Yeah, I am asking myself the same question. "Ness" as that guy in the movie, "You, me and Dupree" said is that attribute that makes one special, the Karl-ness, in that case. I would say, it is the ump in our id, that gumption, that ball in our gut that makes us stand up for ourselves, our ideals, and our values. That force that doesn't allow us to slump on a chair and throw in the towel.

I guess in Catholic parlance (whoops, that sounds a little bit lawyerly, which I'm not) it is the God's grace that was granted to us as we deal with our daily routine.  He gave us that grace of confidence and the strength to rise above all with our head high, with almost nothing but our faith and He will lead us through.