Wednesday, September 10, 2008

Heartbreaks...put a brake on that hurt

My schedule, even play days, has been erratic, Saturday afternoon classes made sure of that.  That has certainly put a dent on time spent with friends; free times were spent more on catching up with laundry and other grown up stuff. Have not even had a cooking session, a movie, or the occassional St. Albert spiritual feed; on Sunday, I might.  Class is over and I missed the new one, I can ruminate of what I have missed and what Lordy wanted me to see..

Anywhoo, just like any, such a change provided  different opportunities to interact with others.  Lordy was showing me something I just need to figure it out.  You see being a member of a community, I get to share the excitement of a new day, the promise of hope, a new tomorrow.  That's the upside, the downside, I put out my shoulders, my ears are big to listen to the heartache, the failed love, the unending despair, where the end of a rainbow seems so unreachable.

I always say, that it is not His will, therefore it doesn't happen.  I know I have no clue as to how much a betrayal hurt that I am not qualified to even opine about it.  But this much I know, if a person did not think twice about dating her best friend's boyfriend then they don't really know much about what Lordy is saying in the Bible about loving thy neighbor as much as He is loved.

There is also that frustation in realizing that the woman that he loves does not fit the mould.  Therefore, the love that he thought he had is gone.  Is that really love? When he was talking about his feelings and his Christianity, I was wowed, saying to myself, that is great to find someone in the presence of God. The bubble burst and I was left with wonder; It was superficial a bad perception of how things should be.

ehhh.. What do I know?

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